I imagine you holding my breasts and kissing my neck. I imagine too many things, and I feel myself getting wet already. I can’t wait to get there and I can’t wait to feel your skin against mine. I just can’t wait to be fucked. Properly fucked; not how he fucks me-because we can and should as husband and wife, but because you want me. And that’s it; we have no feelings for one another, just a want. A want for sex. My phone vibrates against my hand; a message from him. He asks if I’m getting on okay while he’s away, and that he’s bought some presents to bring home for me. I feel guilty and ashamed, but I don’t want to stop. I want the best of both worlds, I’m greedy, I can’t make up my mind, I want love and I want lust. I reply with ‘I’m fine, and thank you! I love you with all of my heart, and I hope you’re having a good time xxxxx’, and I mean every word, except that maybe there is a small part of my heart that feels I am missing out. I feel a cold flutter on my cheek, and realise. There were rows and rows of magazines, ranging from the tame to the explicit, though the latter were censored due to the Obscene Publications Act. It hadn’t been that long since the last police raid on the premises… Proprietor Rick, 35, lanky, greasy and bearded, puffed on his long cigarette. Boyish runaway Peter, just 21, gazed naively at the contents of the shop. He’d only just gotten the job, which was proving to be quite an education for him. “Is there a lot of demand for this homo stuff?” Peter asked Rick. “Yes, it sells pretty well. Mainly to married men. City gents. Public school types.” “I don’t really understand any of this stuff. It does nothing for me.” “Don’t worry, my boy. Later tonight, I’ll show you some proper uncensored stuff. Some of the gay stuff is pretty hot.” “Well, if you must. I just don’t get it at all.” “It’s taking off, Pete, my mate. Zig has been the spur, all that bisexuality stuff. It’s the future, I’m sure of it.” “Really?” “Oh yes, trust me, mate.”.
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